“Does she really like me or just my money?” That question is on our minds every time we date a new Saigon girl. And rightly so, since many use men as their primary source of income.
I think I’ve found a simple rule to screen out the con artists and focus on girls who deserve our spending. It goes like this: If you’re to spend, spend on treats, not gifts. It sounds quite simple yet takes some explaining from a Western (and Red Pill-aware) perspective.
If you live in Saigon, a quick look at your Facebook or Instagram feed will tell a lot about what your local girlfriends value most. Whenever they post something about themselves, it’s to show off either of two things: their looks or their loot. And it doesn’t take a huge mental leap to connect both as cause and consequence.
Looks are the resources they need to grow and maintain to attract men. Loot is what the men bring them in return: money and expenses, blind love and babies, anything they can bag to show off their success in life as women. While the men who surrender the loot are left unmentioned and cropped out on social media, their presence looms over every picture. One after the other, the subtext is the same: “Look how I keep ’em giving!”
Accrual of loot is the fundamental metric on which Vietnamese women are valued by society. Even when presented with other means to attain financial security, such as an education, a career or Daddy’s money, they will never be judged for resorting to looting. It’s just the normal thing to do for a breeding-age woman. If she’s very attractive, she will naturally be assumed to loot rich dudes. “Đại gia, chân dài”: this is the way of the world and always has been.
Most of them don’t have a choice anyway. The vast majority of women around Vietnam are still raised to find a good husband and take care of his family. When that fails or ends up in divorce, they have no backup plan for financial security except to hop onto a bus to Saigon where the serious loot is.
Once upon a time things must have been quite similar for women in the West. But in the feminist middle-class environment where I grew up, they’re pushed to explore other pursuits than satisfying men. They can build their financial security on their own, gain independence from men, and may be more valued for doing so than if they just relied on their looks. Which explains why attractive Western women seldom fuck lower-SMV men, and why Beta men get so much quality pussy here.
Spending on girls works miracles in Vietnam. Any ugly son of a bitch can lay models if he shells out the money. Of course there are hookers you can pay with cash, like anywhere else in the world, but let’s focus on socially acceptable looters here.
Hookers are sinful. Looters are successful.
Full-blown freelance hookers are lazy, stupid or very much in debt. Smart and ambitious girls, on the other hand, play the long game.
I know many women who spent their entire adult life living off men yet swear they never received cash payments in direct relation to sexual favors. (Of course they all pretend to be make-up artists or to run some crappy online business, but you know the type.)
To Western eyes the distinction can be blurry because their primary source of income still is their pussy. But to them, whether or not they tell me the truth, it spells the difference between good and bad girls. Same as a Vietnamese businessman can’t be called corrupt if he doesn’t accept bribes face to face. But I disgress.
Listening to these women for so long, and having some of them for roommates, I’ve come to develop an aversion to giving up loot. I just don’t want to be one of the guys they brag about. It’s not that they’re offensive or derisive, they actually have nice things to say about them, but I certainly wouldn’t like hearing it from a girl I’m seeing. Remember how they said “Nice guys finish last” back in the West? Well, here they can get first in the pants of hot “non-pros” as long as they provide loot.
To go back to the question in my introduction, a girl who really likes you doesn’t need to take loot from you. A girl who’s just into looting you will put a quick end to the “like” part if you stop being generous.
If you’re a man of means, you could argue there’s no shame in surrendering loot to a delightful creature if that puts her on your dick. I know a couple of high-spending, low-SMV dudes who regularly fuck hot chicks and made me somewhat envious during my first years in Vietnam. Knowing what I know now, I wouldn’t want the kind of attention these guys get. The same girls would probably pass on me anyway for the same reasons they’re attracted to these guys: they can sense a man’s spending habits miles away, and they constantly share gossip about us.
I find it revealing that the Vietnamese sexual experiences I remember most vividly are the ones that didn’t involve looting. I already wrote about validational vs. transactional sex but to rephrase, women never fuck for the sake of sex. They always want something in exchange for pussy and when they perceive a man as having higher SMV (Alpha) then the thing they want is validation, not loot.
Of course I like hookers as much as the next guy, but when it comes to dating “non-pros” I want to be fucked on my own merit. I don’t think I’m feeding some narcissistic anxiety; I just enjoy ten times more the raw, feral desire of a woman who wants my affection and nothing else. Denying her any loot yet still getting in her pants is the litmus test for her genuine desire.
Spend inside your frame
Now, this doesn’t mean we should all be a cheap-ass dates. Spending is unavoidable, especially in Asia, but it can signal either Alpha or Beta traits to women depending on how we spend. I posit that if you have to spend on a Saigon girl, it should always be on treats, never on gifts – especially for short-time dating.
Gifts (material objects) are pure loot because she can bring them home. Treats (temporary experiences) can be loot as well, for example if you let her drag you to some expensive place just because you think it’s the required condition to fuck her. Treats shall only be dispensed as rewards, not incentives. You’re taking her to this party or that beach because she’s been chosen as your guest. Her treat is the experience of your reality. You’re inviting her into your world. Or in Red Pill parlance, you keep the frame.
Frame is everything. Always be aware of the subconscious balance of whose frame in which you are operating. Always control the Frame, but resist giving the impression that you are.
Spending inside your frame not only discourages looting, it makes her like you more because it boosts your Alpha traits (Status). Conversely, if you pay for something the girl planned to extract from a man even before meeting you, that she placed over everything else, and that she picked you to provide for her among a crowd of suitors, then you’re acting as a substitutable Beta and her pussy will smell like shame and misery.
Now, what about expensive restaurants and vacations? Are these acceptable treats? Travel and F&B are always tricky expenses because she’ll definitely show them off as loot and crop you out on Instagram, Alpha or not. Back in the real world however, if you stood firm inside your frame (i.e. if you did it for your own fun regardless of outcome), she will respect that and fuck you accordingly. Let the Facebook crowds believe what they want – you know you got your validational sex.
Looting the looters
Of course if you get a looter to genuinely like you, you’ll need to accept that she’s seeing other guys. She still needs the loot – she certainly won’t stop and go get a honest $300/month job just for your Alpha ass. One gets used to having nice things.
Condoms aside, this has nothing but benefits for you as she will keep on making herself pretty on someone else’s dime, and possibly spend his money on you!
I saw this girl for one year who was always upbeat and fun, gave the best blowjobs, and showered me with discarded gifts from her French boyfriend. She ended up equipping my whole appartment with furniture, fans, cookware and tableware. We lost contact when she switched to a highly jealous Vietnamese boyfriend and I didn’t want to get beat up again. But I still think about her every time my maid gets out the Miele vacuum cleaner.
Pictured: Saigon “hotgirl” Võ Thị Ngọc Ngân and her big loots.